August 1, 1774: Joseph Priestly and Carl Wilhelm discover oxygen after isolating it from air. This was welcome news to unfortunate members of the Church of the Repressed Breath, which discouraged its followers from inhaling, lest they suck in “sky demons.” Mostly defunct due to a high mortality rate, the church still exists in pockets of Texas and the Deep South.
March 22, 1733: Joseph Priestly invents carbonated water. Priestly is also pleased to find that the water can be mixed with a variety of flavorings to create refreshing repasts. Experiments lead the chemist to create East End Cobble Crunch, Pungent Peasant, Coca Fizzy Bang, Cholera Lite and Blueberry Blister